Holding On
by BBT78
Summary: While Leonard was away in the North Sea for the summer Penny discovered that she was pregnant. Now only weeks away from her due date tragedy strikes…. This is my first attempt at writing a fanfiction, I actually started writing this a while ago but am only now posting. Feedback of course is welcome! Mainly a Leonard/Penny story .DISCLAIMER: I don't own Big Bang Theory.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Leonard and Howard stood back to admire their handy work. It had taken all of Saturday to paint the nursery and assemble the crib for Leonard and Penny's baby which was now due in a just over two weeks. Penny had discovered that she was pregnant while Leonard had been away on a science expedition to the North Sea the previous summer. It was now late January and they had moved in together in an apartment a few blocks away from the apartment on Los Robles Avenue that Leonard had shared with his roommate and physicist colleague Sheldon Cooper

"Thanks guys you've been such a big help today" Leonard addressed Howard and his wife Bernadette

"Yeah it was so nice of you to give up your Saturday for us" Penny added as she passed Leonard and Howard a bottle of beer each

"It's our pleasure it's been fun" Bernadette said as she slipped her arm around her husband's waist "Maybe one day soon you can return the favour"

Howard and Bernadette exchanged a knowing look and Penny wondered whether they were trying for a baby.

"Sure we'd love to" said Penny

Leonard smiled at Penny who was wearing one of his old shirts that was now splattered with yellow paint. He was more in love with her now than he had ever been; he adored the fact that she was carrying his baby. Penny disappeared into the kitchen to get herself and Bernadette a soda. As she opened the door of the refrigerator and peered inside Leonard approached her from behind and wrapped his arms around her resting his chin on her shoulder

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you wear my shirts?" he whispered into her ear

"You have just last week when we painted the hall" Penny reminded him

She smiled as she remembered the paint fight they had had and how they had wound up having more paint on themselves than on the walls. After the paint fight was over they had then both gotten into the shower where they had made love after and spent the rest of the day in bed completely abandoning the painting for the day. Although their relationship had been strong the previous May when Leonard left for the North Sea, the pregnancy had really brought them together they were closer now than ever and the sex was amazing. Early on in her pregnancy Penny had brought a book on sex during pregnancy and ever since they had both enjoyed experimenting with various positions.

"Leonard we have company honey" Penny reminded him as he began to kiss her neck making her skin tingle

"Maybe we could get rid of them and have an early night? I've been thinking about the night we conceived this little on" Leonard grinned as he worked his kisses from her neck round to her lips and placed his hands on her belly

Their baby had been conceived on the night before Leonard had departed for the North Sea. That evening Penny and his friends had thrown him a going away party in his apartment, he remembered how stunning she had looked in her little black dress and how she had teased him throughout the evening whispering into his ear about what she wanted to do to him and sending him seductive text messages. In the end they had wound up making love on the couch in her apartment and in the weeks that followed Penny had begun to feel different somehow, although she was unable to put her finger on it. It wasn't until her period was nearly a week late that she realised she might be pregnant.

Now back in the present Penny had a suggestion for him

"Why don't you go take a cold shower while I go get the takeout?" The suggestion was met with a groan from Leonard

"Go on go, before I change my mind!" Penny commanded giving Leonard a gentle shove in the direction of the door

"Ok ok I'm going"

As Leonard reached the doorway he paused

"I love you Penny I can't wait for us to be a family"

There had never been a time in his life when he had felt as happy as he did now. Penny was his world and very soon he would have everything he ever wanted

"I love you to Hofstadter" Penny replied

Leonard disappeared off to the bathroom and Penny headed to the bedroom where she quickly changed into Leonard's one and only football shirt and smiled to herself as she pulled it over her head remembering when he had worn it to watch a football game with her friends. The baby kicked and for a moment she looked at herself in the full length mirror whilst rubbing her large belly. As she picked up her purse and phone Bernadette poked her head around the bedroom door an offered to go along with her to pick up the takeout. Penny was more than pleased.

"Actually I'm glad you decided to come along Bernadette I have something I want to run by you" Penny said after they had been driving for five minutes

"I'm listening"

"Well do you remember Valentine's Day last year when Leonard and I had the fight at the restaurant?"

"Yeah sure" replied Bernadette Penny's reminder trigged the memory of the fight she had had with Howard when he hadn't done the laundry and she had hidden his Xbox

"Well after Leonard tried to propose that night and I shot him down he agreed that he wouldn't propose again and that it would be up to me to propose in the future"

Bernadette looked over at her Penny as she pulled her red Volkswagen to a stop at a red light at an intersection

"So you're going to propose to Leonard?"

Penny's face broke into a beaming smile; the baby was due at the beginning of February so she was planning to propose on Valentine's Day shortly after the baby's birth

"Yeah I'm so excited part of me wants to propose now but I think it will nice to do it on Valentine's Day especially considering how badly I treated him last year…"

Penny leant forward and opened the glove compartment and took out a small box inside which was a ring with a small diamond and slipped it onto her finger

"This was my grandmother's engagement ring; mom gave it to me when I went home to Nebraska in the fall"

"It's beautiful Penny I'm so happy for you" Bernadette squeezed her friend's knee

"He'd better say yes" Penny said jokingly turning up the volume on the radio Marry Me by Bruno Mars had just come on

Penny was busy admiring the ring on her finger that she didn't notice that the traffic light had changed to green; the car behind began to sound its horn impatiently

"Ok ok I'm going" Penny shouted glaring into her rear view mirror before putting her car into drive and pressing down on the accelerator, the car rolled forward out into the junction

"Penny watch out!" Bernadette screamed

A car coming from the opposite direction at the intersection had run through a red light at speed and was on a collision course with the side of Penny's car. Penny's instincts told her to hit the accelerator to get out its path but it was too late. The oncoming car smashed into side of her car sending it rolling onto its side. The last thing Penny saw was a glimpse of her engagement ring as her hands gripped the steering wheel before the world turned black.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 **

Leonard came out from the bathroom wearing his red robe and white sox, a towel hung around his shoulder, his hair still damp from the shower. Howard had settled down on the couch to watch TV and was flicking through channels with the remote control.

"The girls still not back yet?" he commented looking around the seemingly empty apartment

"Not yet" replied Howard

Leonard perched himself on the arm of the couch, the clock on his cell phone told him that they had been gone for the best part of an hour now which was starting to concern him as the takeout restaurant was only about a ten minute drive away.

"I guess they may have stopped for coffee or ice cream Penny has had a real craving for cookies and cream ice cream lately…" his mind drifted off as he thought of the dozens of runs to the convenience store he had made over the last four months in order to satisfy Penny's latest craving several of which had been in the middle of the night.

"Do you wanna play some halo while we wait for them to get back?" Howard suggested there was nothing worth watching on TV

Leonard agreed and went off to get dressed into his usual ensemble of jeans, and t-shirt and a hoodie. They had been playing for half an hour when Howard's cell phone began to vibrate on the coffee table the words 'Bernie calling' was displayed on the screen.

"Hi Bernie have you guys gone to Shanghai to get the takeout? Leonard and I are starving here…"

The male voice that spoke after stopped Howard dead in his tracks, putting down his controller Leonard watched as the colour drained from his friends face

"Are they hurt badly? Which hospital are they being taken to?" Howard said to the voice at the other end of the line "Ok I'm on my way right now"

Howard's ended the call and allowed the hand that was holding the phone to slip slowly down to his side.

"Howard what's going on?" Leonard demanded his voice shaking

"That was an officer from the Pasadena police department Bernadette and Penny have been hurt in a collision with another car" he answered feeling as though he had fallen into the deeps of a terrible dream.

"Oh my God is it bad?"

Howard shook his head slowly, the police officer hadn't been able to convey any details about either of their conditions, quickly got to his feet eager to leave and get to the hospital.

"I don't know they couldn't tell me, Leonard we need to go right now"

Leonard and Howard drove most of the journey in silence each with their own private thoughts of their wife and girlfriend. Arriving at the emergency room they headed straight for the reception desk only to be told that they needed to wait for a doctor to come to talk with them.

"I can't believe this is happening" Howard said as he and Leonard sank into seats in the waiting room "Two hours ago we were painting your nursery and now…." his voice drifted off the two most important people in their lives had been hurt and not knowing anything was killing them both.

As it was they didn't have long to wait the nurse they had spoken with at the reception desk was now speaking with a doctor wearing green scrubs, she pointed over at Howard and Leonard the doctor began to walk towards them

"Mr Wolowitz? I'm Dr Carpenter I've been treating your wife"

"How is she?" Howard stammered he could feel his heart pounding in his chest

"Bernadette has fractured her wrist and has some cuts and bruises and a minor concussion we'll keep her in tonight for observation but she will make a full recovery"

Howard couldn't hide his relief when he had taken the call he had immediately feared the worst, tears of relief began to fill his eyes

"And what about Penny she was driving?" Leonard asked

"And you are?" the doctor asked looking down at the clipboard he was holding

"Dr. Hofstadter I'm Penny's boyfriend and the father of her baby, please is she gonna be alright?"

The doctor studied his clipboard and frowned

"Penny's condition is serious I'm afraid she has a fractured pelvis which has caused an internal bleed and she sustained a head trauma…"

"Please I need to see her" Leonard was practically begging to be taken to her and got to his feet

"I'm sorry that's not possible Dr. Hofstadter Penny is in the OR right now undergoing an emergency C-section and repairs to her pelvis"

Leonard could feel his throat getting tighter and reached in his pocket for his asthma inhaler

"But she's not due for another two weeks" Leonard interjected

"I can assure you that a C-section is the best option for Penny and for her baby please be assured we're doing all that we can" the doctor said in a tone which sounded well-rehearsed "I'll come back as soon as I have some more news"

The doctor walked away and disappeared through a set of double doors, Howard put a comforting hand on Leonard's shoulder

"Hang in there buddy she's in good hands" he said not knowing what else to say

Knowing he had no other choice Leonard took out his cell phone and dialled Penny's parents in Nebraska, Penny's father Wyatt answered. He hated breaking bad news and at first upon hearing Penny's father's voice he was unable to speak

"Hi Leonard good to hear from you son. How are you? How's that daughter of mine? I bet she's got you running around after her"

Leonard swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat

"Wyatt there's been an accident…."

Wyatt listened in silence to what Leonard had to say, although in truth other than the fact that Penny was in surgery and her injuries were serious there was not much he could tell him. He certainly was unable to be of any comfort to him. As expected Wyatt was deeply shocked and said that he and his wife would take the next available flight to LA

"I'll call you when I have more news" Leonard said before ending the call

Howard went off to see Bernadette returning a short while afterwards; she had been transferred from the ER to a room and had already fallen asleep

"How is she?" asked Leonard

"She's really shaken up but physically she's gonna be ok" Howard answered "She was asking about Penny and the baby is there any news?"

Leonard shook his head, an hour had gone by but still there had been no further news

"I can't lose her Howard, not now after everything we've been through…."

There was a long silence

"Did Bernadette say anything about the accident?" Leonard eventually asked

"A car ran a red light at an intersection and ploughed into Penny's car apparently the driver had been drinking" replied Howard "It seems he only sustained minor injuries"

Leonard instantly hated him with a passion; there was seemingly no justice in the world when Penny and Bernadette had both been hurt and the perpetrator of the accident had escaped unharmed.

"I'm going to get some coffee do you want some?" Howard offered

Leonard didn't reply and continued to stare into space lost in his thoughts, he couldn't think about anything right now other than Penny and their baby.

As Howard walked down the hall in the direction of the cafeteria he thought he heard a voice from behind the curtains of one of the cubicles that seemed familiar to him, although at first he couldn't place where he had heard it before. The curtain drew back and there on the bed was sat Jimmy Speckerman Leonard's childhood bully who he had met a couple of years ago when Leonard had decided to face up to him. He appeared to have stiches in his head

"You're ok to go now Mr Speckerman I'll get your discharge papers" the doctor was saying

The doctor walked passed Howard and approached a police officer who was stood in the hall leaning up against the wall.

"We're discharging him he's all yours now" she told him

The police officer approached Jimmy who had now gotten down off the bed and began to give him his rights before arresting him. As he turned away Howard overheard the doctor speaking to one of the nurses at the nurse's station

"Was that the son of a bitch that caused the RTC today with the pregnant lady and her friend?"

The doctor who was busily typing on the computer nodded

"Boy I hope they lock him up and throw away the key" the nurse retorted and looked over in Jimmy's direction with a look of disgust

Howard narrowed his eyes he could feel his fists begin to clinch

"Hey Howard"

The familiar voice of his friend Raj from behind him caused him to turn around

"I got your message man I'm so sorry how's Bernadette and Penny?" he asked with a look of concern, both Penny and Bernadette were good friends of his

Howard watched as Jimmy was led away in handcuffs walking right by him and Raj, and glared at him hoping that he could sense the hatred he was feeling right then

"Was that Jimmy Speckerman?" Raj questioned Howard as he turned to his friend he saw tears spilling down Howard's cheeks, tears of sheer anger

"Howard buddy what's going on?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Leonard was sat staring down at his Converse sneakers when the doctor finally returned with news of Penny and the baby.

"What's happening?" Leonard demanded by now he was beside himself with anxiousness

"Dr Hofstadter we've delivered the baby, you have a daughter, she is however having some trouble breathing so she's been transferred to the neonatal ICU mostly as a precaution, but we're hopeful that she will be ok"

Leonard's eyes glistened with a mixture of both happy and sad tears as the news that he now had a daughter began to sink in.

"And Penny?"

"Penny is still in surgery, as I said before her injuries are serious particularly the head trauma"

"But she will be ok right?" Leonard asked desperately seeking reassurance

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that Dr. Hofstadter the next few days are going to be critical we just have to wait and see if Penny's condition improves…"

All Leonard could focus on was the distinct note of doubt in what the doctor had just said

"Are you saying she might not make it?" he could barely get the words out

"We're doing all we can Dr. Hofstadter maybe you would like to go see your daughter?"

A few minutes later Leonard was following a nurse down the hall and into an elevator up to the neonatal unit. The instant he saw his daughter laying in an incubator in a pink baby grow he fell totally in love. She was so tiny but to him she was perfect. She appeared to have Penny's facial features but his dark hair. Looking around him Leonard could see three other couples starring anxiously at their babies, he realised that he was the only parent in the unit that was alone.

"She's doing really well Dr Hofstadter" a nurse wearing scrubs with a teddy bear pattern said and then added "Would you like to touch her?"

Leonard hesitated she looked so fragile he was afraid he might harm her

"It's ok you won't hurt her in fact we encourage parents to have physical contact with their babies it helps with bonding"

The nurse opened the side of the incubator and Leonard reached in and touched her tiny soft hand his heart melted when his daughter curled her fingers around his finger. Leonard looked at his daughter lovingly and for a moment almost forgot the painful circumstances that had led her to be born that day.

"Hi beautiful I'm your daddy" Leonard whispered

"Have you and your wife discussed names?" the nurse asked a minute later

"Erm yeah but we haven't decided on one yet" he replied not wanting to correct her on the fact that Penny wasn't actually his wife

"Ok so its baby Hofstadter for now"

For the next hour Leonard sat looking in awe at his daughter until Penny's doctor came in with the news that the surgery was over

"Penny's out of surgery" he began to tell Leonard "We've managed to stop the internal bleeding but her head trauma is still of concern, she hasn't yet awakened from the surgery and at the moment she's in a deep state of unconsciousness"

For the first time Leonard looked away from his daughter to look the doctor in the eye

"You mean she's in a coma?"

"Yes I'm afraid she is"

"But she will wake up right?" Leonard was desperate to remain positive, although he wasn't a medical doctor he had read a great deal of medical literature and was fully aware of the implications of a traumatic head injury and it scared him to death.

"At the moment we just have to take every day as it comes" the doctor was choosing his words carefully not wanting to give any false sense of hope

"Will you take me to her now please? I need to be with her"

Since arriving at the hospital at hearing of the seriousness of Penny's injuries Leonard had been mentally preparing himself for seeing her, but nothing could have prepared him for the sight of the woman he loved lying helpless in the ICU. All around Penny was surrounded by machines and monitors that beeped and blinked lights. A breathing tube was inserted into her mouth and her head was wrapped in a white bandage. There were tiny cuts on her face probably from the broken glass of the car windows. For a long time all Leonard could do was stand rooted to the spot staring down at her.

"I know it's daunting to see someone you love like this, why don't you try talking to her?" a nurse who introduced herself as Sarah coaxed as she checked one of the monitors and made notes on Penny's chart "You might find it helps"

Leonard pulled up a seat and carefully took Penny's hand fearful of disturbing one of the tubes that were snaking from her body and kissed it. His tears fell onto Penny's hand making it moist to touch.

"Hey honey it's me can you hear me? You were in an accident sweetie but you're gonna be fine I promise" he leant over and kissed her forehead "And guess what you're a mommy now we have a baby girl… oh Penny she's so beautiful just like her mommy"

Leonard wiped away his tears with the sleeve of his jacket and continued to stroke Penny's cheek desperate for the slightest reaction that would indicate she had heard him.

"You have to fight this Penny I need you to get better, you can't leave me not like this honey" Leonard choked back a sob "I need you…"

On the bedside table lay a plastic bag filled with Penny's belongings, her cell phone, purse and the locket he had given her the day he had left for the North Sea. Picking it up Leonard realised he didn't recognise the ring that was inside; he was certain he had never seen Penny wear it before and wondered where it had come from. Feeling totally exhausted he rested his head on the bed still holding onto Penny's hand fell fast asleep and into dreams of her.

Early the following morning Penny's parents arrived having taken a red eye flight to LA, they were both themselves with a combination of worry and exhaustion having been awake all night. Wyatt pulled Leonard into a bear hug and for a long while all three of them cried with a mixture of sadness and exhaustion. Leonard was so relieved to have them here with him; he was particularly fond of Wyatt who had always approved whole heartedly of Penny's relationship with him

"You have a granddaughter" Leonard told them choking on his words "She's in the neonatal ICU but her doctors are saying that she's gonna be ok"

Now Penny's parent's tears were for a different reason

"We're here for you son, we're all going to get through this together" Wyatt said holding Leonard firmly by the shoulders, behind him Leonard could see his wife was crying softly dabbing her eyes with a tissue

As Wyatt and his wife turned their attention to their daughter lying in the bed, Leonard decided to give them some privacy and slipped out into the hall in search of coffee. As he wandered in somewhat dazed state he ran into Howard by the vending machine, he appeared to have also spent the night at the hospital

"How's are they both?" he asked

"Baby Hofstadter is doing ok but there's no change for Penny she's still unconscious" Leonard answered "How's Bernadette doing?"

"She's ok the doctor said she can probably go home later today"

The machine had finished dispensing the coffee Howard took his cup and took a sip

"Do you think Bernadette would be up to seeing me?" Leonard asked

"I guess although I wouldn't ask her too much about the accident she's pretty upset…"

Howard didn't want to tell his friend but Bernadette had woken up screaming in the middle of the night and it had taken him a long time to calm her and to get her back to sleep.

Pushing the door open to Bernadette's room Leonard stepped inside. Bernadette was lying on her side facing away from the door. Leonard made his way around the bed

"Hi Bernadette how are you feeling?" he asked softly

Bernadette gave a sad smile when she saw her friend looking down at her

"Hi Leonard I'm ok" she replied "How's Penny?"

Howard had told her the night before about Penny undergoing surgery and the baby being born

"She's hanging in there, but there's no change yet"

A single tear rolled down Bernadette's cheek

"It all happened so fast…" she began but was unable to continue

"It's ok you don't have to talk about that right now" Leonard soothed and took Bernadette's hand. He waited for her crying to subside before asking her about the ring he had found among Penny's belongings

"I'm sure I've never seen it before" he told her "Do you remember Penny wearing it?"

Bernadette did. The whole scene just prior to the accident was etched firmly in her memory.

"Bernadette?" Leonard coaxed he didn't want to press her to much in her fragile state but on the other hand it had been playing on his mind since the night before and he wanted to know.

"Yes she was wearing it when we had the accident" Bernadette answered slowly

"Where did she get it from?"

"It was her Grandmother's engagement ring; her mom gave it to her when she was last home"

Leonard knew that Penny's grandmother had died whilst he had been away during the summer, Penny had been really upset and Leonard had hated the fact that he hadn't been there to comfort her in her time of need.

"If she's had it since the fall why has she never shown it to me or worn it?" Leonard wondered out loud

Bernadette bit down on her lip knowing it wasn't her place to tell him about Penny's plan to propose. As it was she didn't need to Leonard now had a look of realisation on his face as he worked it out.

"Was Penny going to propose to me?" he asked

Bernadette's tears had begun to fall again

"Yes" she said in a barely audible whisper


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

As expected Bernadette was discharged from hospital later that day with instructions to rest up at home for the next few days. Howard insisted on pushing her in a wheelchair out to the parking lot even though she was able to walk unaided. Sat bedside her husband in the car Bernadette began to tremble as she watched him reach for the ignition to start the engine.

"Wait!" she gasped and grabbed Howard's hand away from the steering wheel

"What is it honey?" Howard asked seeing the fear in Bernadette's eyes

"I'm scared Howie"

It had been less than 24 hours since the accident and it was still playing over and over in her mind like a movie stuck on repeat.

"It's gonna be ok sweetie we'll be home soon" Howard promised her "And then I'm gonna take really good care of you"

He had already called his boss to ask if he could take the next few days off work so that he could stay at home with Bernadette. Howard started the engine and put the car into reverse

"I'm pregnant" Bernadette blurted out

Howard hit the brake

"When I was brought here yesterday the doctor asked if I could be pregnant, he ran a test and…."

"You're pregnant?"

Howard couldn't quite believe it they had only taken the decision to start trying for a baby around the time of Thanks Giving.

"Yeah I knew my period was a little late but I didn't know until yesterday"

Howard lent forward and pulled Bernadette towards him he had always wanted to have children but hadn't imagined it would happen so soon. They embraced for a long while.

"I love you Bernadette" he said looking deep into her eyes

"I love you too" Bernadette answered

"Howie what if Penny doesn't make it?"

The thought of losing her friend and the devastation it would mean for Leonard was eating her up

"We have to try and be positive for Leonard's sake" Howard said "He really needs us right now"

Bernadette nodded slowly knowing without doubt the next few days and weeks were going to be really tough. Once home Bernadette settled down on the couch while Howard covered her with a blanket and spent the rest of the afternoon fussing over her. By late afternoon Bernadette suggested Howard go back to the hospital to check in on Leonard, after some persuasion and very reluctantly he left and drove back to the hospital. Arriving at the ICU Howard approached the nurses' station and was pointed in the direction of a side room. He found Leonard alone with Penny her parents had apparently returned back to her apartment to shower and rest. Leonard had yet to leave Penny's side, except for to visit his daughter down in the neonatal unit.

"How's she doing?" Howard asked trying to hide his shock at seeing Penny for the first time

"She's fighting..." Leonard replied without looking away from Penny or letting go of her hand "you know Penny she's tough she wouldn't want anyone or anything to get the better of her" Leonard had put emphasis on the word 'anything' "She's just having a little rest right now aren't you sweetie? And when you wake up we're gonna be a family, you me and our daughter"

Howard suspected that Leonard's optimism was an attempt to convince himself of a positive outcome. Howard pulled up a seat; he had been wrestling with his conscience all day and had come to the conclusion that Leonard had a right to know about the other driver involved in the accident. It wasn't going to be easy telling him, but equally there was never going to be a good time to break such shattering news.

"Leonard there's something you need to know about the accident" Howard began but paused when a nurse entered the room to check on Penny leaving a few minutes later

"What is it Howard?" Leonard questioned

"The driver of the car that collided with Penny and Bernadette it was Jimmy Speckerman"

Leonard looked up for the first time

"What?"

"He was in the ER yesterday I saw him get arrested"

Leonard could feel the hatred building inside him, it had been bad enough when the driver had been a stranger but now that he knew it was the jerk that had made his high school days a total misery he his anger increased tenfold.

"Leonard are you ok?" Howard asked when Leonard failed to respond

"No Howard I'm anything but ok, my girlfriend and daughter are fighting for their lives and then I find out that it was the guy who tormented be throughout high school and made my life hell that put them there…. He always was a selfish son of a bitch who didn't care who he hurt…"

As soon as he finished his rant Leonard apologised to his friend realising that Penny and his baby were not the only victims of the accident, although Bernadette's injuries hadn't been life threatening she had still been badly shaken.

"I'm sorry Howard I didn't mean to yell at you, I just don't know how much more I can take of this" he explained

"Its ok buddy we're all here for you" Howard assured him thinking how easily it could have been Bernadette lying in the bed instead of Penny

They sat in silence for a while until Howard suggested Leonard go home and get some sleep and questioned him as to when he last had something to eat, he looked ready to drop with exhaustion, but Leonard flatly refused.

"I can't leave Penny" he insisted

"Leonard you can't do this by yourself you'll end up making yourself sick" Howard pointed out "Why don't we get a rota and take it in turns coming here so that Penny's not left alone?"

Howard knew for certain Bernadette and Raj would be more than willing to help and also Amy the only one he wasn't sure about was Sheldon who had an aversion to hospitals.

"That would be great" Leonard forced a weak smile he was so glad to have such supportive friends around him at this time of great need

Over the next two weeks Leonard got into a routine. He had to return to his job at the university but as soon as he finished for the day he would drive directly to the hospital to be with Penny and baby Hofstadter. Mostly he would wind up spending the night, driving home early in the morning to shower and change before heading back to work. He had fallen behind with his work so Penny's hospital room had become his makeshift office, often he would work into the early hours of the morning sitting cross legged on the armchair in the corner of the room with his laptop resting on his knees. It gave him comfort to be near to her and to watch over her. Now it was morning and the sun streaked in through the gaps in the window blinds waking Leonard as he slept on the armchair. The room was now completely full with get well soon cards all of which Leonard had read aloud to her and helium balloons, there were so many people that loved Penny. Getting up Leonard rubbed his eyes and wandered over to her bed bent over and kissed her softly.

"Good morning gorgeous how are you doing today?"

He stroked her hair the bandage had now been removed to reveal her long blond hair

"Are you going to open those beautiful eyes and look at me today honey?"

Penny remained motionless in the bed

"I have to go to work now but Sheldon and Amy are coming by this afternoon and Raj said he would come too"

He hated to leave her; even now her doctors said her condition was stable he still feared that something would happen to her while he wasn't there.

Sarah bounded cheerfully into the room and picked up Penny's chart

"Good morning Leonard"

"Morning Sarah"

"Good morning Penny honey" Sarah addressed Penny touching her hand

Often Leonard would come into Penny's room to find Sarah talking away to her about everything and anything as she worked

"How's your work going Leonard?" she asked as she replaced Penny's IV

Leonard talked for the next few minutes about his work Sarah smiled but admitted she didn't understand any of what he had said, although it did all sound very impressive

"Anyone who got selected to work for Professor Hawking must be a genius"

Leonard blushed slightly he still wasn't all together comfortable receiving compliments even though he had achieved so much in his career over the years

One of the monitors began to beep loudly drawing Sarah's attention from Leonard back to Penny.

"What is it?" asked Leonard instantly his face wrinkled into a worried expression

"Penny's temperature is a little high it's probably nothing but I'll ask one of the doctors to come and have a look at her"

"Maybe I should stay" Leonard said immediately

Sarah shook her head and gave a reassuring smile

"No you go, I'm sure it will be fine you must have so much work to catch up on"

Leonard couldn't disagree he was falling drastically behind with his work and although his boss Professor Gablehauser had been very understanding it did bother him that the work was increasingly piling up.

"You will call me if there's the slightest change?" Leonard asked for at least the fourth time as he followed Sarah out into the hall leaving Penny's room

"Of course but I'm sure it's nothing to get excited about" Sarah put a comforting arm on Leonard's shoulder "I know it's not easy but try not to worry Leonard"

Feeling only slightly reassured Leonard headed off down the hallway in the direction of the elevator. At that very moment alone in her room for a few seconds Penny's eyelids fluttered and opened and she stared up at the lights on the ceiling, but her eyelids felt so heavy it was impossible to keep them open. For those brief seconds Penny had come back to the world.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

A few hours after Leonard left the hospital Sheldon and Amy arrived for their visit. It had taken a lot of persuasion for Amy to convince her germ phobic boyfriend to participate in Leonard's rota for but finally after making many excuses he had relented.

"So which magazine shall we read bestie?" Amy asked as she looked through the pile of glossy fashion and celebrity gossip magazines that were Leonard had accumulated for the purpose of reading aloud to Penny.

"Really Amy? Does anyone seriously care whom celebrities are currently dating or this seasons _'must have' _lip gloss? I knew I should have brought my latest paper with me….."

"Please Sheldon you have to try Penny loves this stuff" Amy protested

"You know there is no conclusive evidence that auditory stimuli can have the effect of waking coma patients..."

Amy couldn't disagree as a neuroscientist she knew this probably more than any of them, but as a friend she would do anything to try and help her best friend recover. Sheldon picked up a magazine and thumbed through it.

"Alright I'll try" he said making a face that told Amy he was by no means convinced

For the next hour Sheldon and Amy took it in turns to read from the magazines until Sheldon finally had had enough, despite this Amy was very proud of him for his efforts. She knew that this visit hadn't been easy for him. Although he hadn't in anyway confided in her or let his true feelings be known, but she was certain that Penny's accident had hit him really hard.

"It really makes you think doesn't it?" Amy said as she looked at her best friend "About how precious life is and how much time we all waste not being honest about our feelings or getting into fights over stupid stuff..."

"I don't know what you mean Amy" Sheldon stared out the window "I never waste time and you know I don't ever like to fight"

Amy sighed it was probably too much to expect that Sheldon would pick up on her subtle hints, she so wanted their relationship to become intimate

"Never mind" Amy replied "Maybe we should get going"

Amy stood up and squeezed Penny's hand

"I'll be back soon bestie"

Amy looked at Sheldon

"Say goodbye to Penny Sheldon"

"Why? She can't hear me" Sheldon pointed out

Amy had to bite her tongue sometimes her boyfriend could be so exasperating

"Please Sheldon it's what Leonard wants"

Sheldon sighed

"Very well Goodbye Penny"

Amy nodded in the direction of Penny's hand wanting her boyfriend to replicate her hand squeeze knowing that a kiss would be totally out of the question.

Sheldon reached down and touched Penny's hand and for a second Amy was certain she saw tears glistening in his eyes

"Ok can we leave now please?" he said already heading in the direction of the door

"I'm so proud of you Sheldon" Amy told her boyfriend and as they stepped into the hallway for the second time that day Penny opened her eyes. To her it felt like surreal dream in which she recalled hearing Sheldon talking about Jennifer Aniston's new diet and exercise regime before the darkness pulled her back.

Raj wandered into the comic book store looking lost in his own thoughts having just returned from visiting Penny at the hospital. He had spent the time alone with her and had played a selection of her favourite music on his iPod. Never before had he cried the whole way through Beyoncé's greatest hits album, seeing Penny today had really gotten to him and he badly needed a distraction.

"Hey Raj are you ok?" asked Stuart who owned the store

"I just got back from the hospital" Raj replied "It's so hard seeing her like that knowing that there's nothing any of us can do…."

"But you are doing something" Stuart was quick to point out "You're supporting Leonard and doing the best you can for Penny, you guys are amazing friends"

Raj shrugged and starred down at his feet he wanted to be positive but as more time went by he could sense that hope was fading for everyone including Leonard. The store was empty of other customers so Stuart took the decision to lock the door and flipped the 'Open' sign to 'Closed'

"You look like you could use a beer" he said and Raj followed him to the back of the store where Stuart retrieved two beers from the refrigerator and they both sat down on a worn looking couch which Stuart for quite some time had used as a bed

"Thanks Stuart you're a good friend" Raj said as he sipped his beer

"No problem"

Stuart was glad to be able to support Raj, particularly after he had helped him so much the previous year when he had run into both emotional and financial difficulties

Raj's cell phone beeped indicating that he had received a text message, taking it out of his pants pocket he looked at the screen

"It's from Leonard" he said out loud as he opened the text message instantly his face broke into a smile

"It's Penny she's awake!"

"Oh my God that's awesome Leonard must be psyched!" exclaimed Stuart

Raj began to cry with sheer relief as Stuart pulled him into hug

"Hey it's gonna be ok now" Stuart assured his friend

Without thinking Stuart wiped away one of his tears and before he could stop himself he cupped Raj's face in his hands and pressed his lips to his. It was something which he had been longing to do for so long.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

A short while after Raj had left the hospital Leonard had arrived having driven directly from work again. It had been a long day and he was finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate on his work. That evening at Penny's bedside the sense of despair that he had been supressing for two weeks now began to overwhelm him and he found himself taking out his frustrations on Penny .

"Penny you need to wake up now. I've had enough honey I can't take any more of this" he pleaded grabbing her hand and squeezing it tightly

"Now come on I need you, you're no good to me lying here in this bed, I need you back home with me… do you hear me Penny?... Penny! Wake up Penny!"

As he yelled her name for the third time he felt his hand being squeezed gently at first but then tighter. Penny's eyelids began to flutter

"Come on sweetie open your eyes" Leonard coaxed before getting to his feet and pressing the call bell above the bed, a few seconds later Sarah came running into the room

"She's awake, Penny's awake!" Leonard cried

Sarah took hold of Penny's other hand and asked her to squeeze it. Penny obliged unable to speak with the breathing tube that was inserted in her mouth

"Good girl well done" Sarah praised as the doctor arrived and asked Leonard to step outside for a moment, promising him that it would only be a few minutes. When he was permitted to come back in the breathing tube had been removed and Penny was now being given oxygen via a nasal cannula.

"Penny do you know where you are?" the doctor was asking

Penny's lips moved and then she gave a quiet groan

"In the hospital" she replied slowly and then followed it with "My baby…"

Leonard was astounded to finally hear Penny's voice again

"You were in an accident and you've been unconscious for a couple of weeks but you're doing really well and so is your little girl" the doctor assured her

Penny lips curled into a weak smile she hadn't known when she was pregnant that she was expecting a girl

"Bernadette" she breathed

Memories of the accident were coming back to her; Leonard stepped forward to offer his comfort

"Bernadette's fine sweetie, everything is gonna be ok now"

Penny looked as though she wanted to say something but couldn't get the words out letting out a soft sigh her eyes closed again; Leonard looked up at Sarah with concern

"Don't expect to much from her yet" she told him "I know it sounds strange because she's be unconscious for such a long time, but she will be feeling exhausted right now and will need a lot of rest"

"Can I stay with her?" Leonard asked he couldn't bare the thought of being separated from her now even for a minute

The doctor agreed so long as Penny was able to rest and although he was exhausted himself somehow Leonard couldn't bring himself to close his eyes, preferring to watch over Penny as she slept peacefully. Not wanting to leave her side he had asked Sarah to call Penny's parents to let them know the happy news. A short while later Penny began to stir again, this time she was indicating that she was thirsty so Leonard provided her with a few sips of water through a straw. She was still incredibly weak and only able to manage a few words

"Hey you how are you doing honey?" Leonard asked as he stroked Penny's hair "Are you in any pain?"

"I want to see my baby" Penny said in a weak voice "Pleeassase Leonard"

At that moment Penny's parents entered the room having received a phone call from Sarah and rushed towards the bed

"You're awake honey" Wyatt said through his tears "Thank God we've been so worried about you sweetie"

"Hi Dad, Mom"

Penny turned her head towards Leonard and looked at him with pleading eyes, although she was exhausted she couldn't wait any longer to meet her daughter. Leonard headed off to the neonatal unit returning ten minutes later wheeling their daughter in a plastic crib. Penny had already fallen back to sleep, Leonard brushed her hair away from her face and Penny awoke immediately to see her baby sleeping Leonard's arms

"Say hi to our daughter" Leonard whispered not wanting to wake her up; carefully he laid her down on Penny's chest

"She's so beautiful" Penny breathed looking down in wonder at her baby

Behind Leonard stood Penny's parents both beaming with pride and happiness

"Have you thought of any names?" Penny's mom asked

"I want to name her after Grandma, if it's ok with you Leonard"

Leonard had never met Penny's grandmother but he felt that he knew her Penny had been very close to her and had talked about her often

"Grace" Leonard said "I love it"

Leonard plonked a kiss on baby Grace's head, Penny was beginning to tire quickly her head flopped forward but she was determined to stay awake for just a few minutes longer. There was something important she intended to do

"Marry me Leonard"

The room fell silent the only sound was the beeping from Penny's heart monitor. Slowly Leonard took Penny's grandmother's ring out of his jacket pocket, he had kept it on his person since the night of the accident hoping that Penny would awake and propose. Carefully he slipped the ring on her finger and kissed her hand

"When I said last year that I wanted your proposal to be to be 'the whole nine yards' this isn't quite what I had in mind…" he said smiling through happy tears "Penny I love you so much of course I'll marry you"

"I love you too Hofstadter" by the time Penny had finished her reply she had fallen asleep

Wyatt grabbed Leonard's hand and shook it vigorously while Penny's mom kissed him. Beyond any doubt this was the happiest moment of his Leonard's life and he never wanted the feeling to end.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Over the next couple of days Penny and Leonard's friends all came to hospital, although it was made clear that their visits should be kept brief as it was important that Penny got as much rest as possible. She was making good progress and her doctor said she would probably be discharged from the ICU and moved to a general room within a day or two.

Penny was bottle feeding Grace while Leonard was working on his laptop. He had called Professor Gablehauser who had agreed that could work from home or in Leonard's case the hospital for the next few days

"Leonard I don't think I want to wait to get married" Penny came out and said, Leonard looked up from typing

"What do you mean honey?"

"My doctor thinks that it's gonna be at least two weeks maybe more before I'm discharged from here and then I'm going to need physical therapy, I don't want to wait that long…." Penny's voice trailed off

"So what are you suggesting? That we get married here in the hospital?"

Penny nodded

"Yeah that's exactly what I'm suggesting" Grace had finished feeding and needed to be winded so Penny passed her to Leonard "We're a family now I want it to be official"

Leonard thought through Penny's suggestion for a few moments, he had heard of couples getting married in hospital before although usually it was in the case of a terminal illness

"And its Valentine's Day next week isn't it?" Penny added

When she had first regained consciousness she had been unaware of the date until Leonard had told her it was the 4th February. It seemed very fitting for them to be married on Valentine's Day after the pact they had made the previous year. The more he thought about it the more Leonard liked the idea. They could always have a reception for all their friends and family in the summer when Penny was fully recovered.

"What do you think Grace do you think I should marry your mommy on Valentine's Day?" Leonard asked his daughter as he patted her back, Grace gurgled

"I think she smiled at me" Leonard said although he knew full well it was most probably wind, leaning forward Leonard kissed his soon to be wife

"Let's do it"

It was the night before the wedding and despite Leonard's protests that he didn't want a bachelor party the guys had insisted.

"I am the best man and social protocol dictates that it is my responsibility to throw a kick ass bachelor party" Sheldon had asserted

"Ok but I don't want anything crazy to happen" Leonard had warned them all "I'm getting married tomorrow and I don't want ANYTHING to go wrong"

As it was, on very short notice Sheldon and Howard arranged a bachelor party to be held at the comic book store, despite numerous protests from Raj which neither Leonard not Raj could fathom. After his kiss with Stuart, Raj had had raced out of the store declaring it to have been a mistake. Stuart had tried to call him several times since but Raj was choosing to ignore him, in truth he hadn't been able to stop thinking about him. A little after 9pm and the party was in full swing, Leonard was touched to see all his friends there. In true bachelor party style Howard and Raj had planned a little ridicule for Leonard and had insisted that he wear the Super Girl costume they had got him or be subject to a truth or dare type forfeit. So far Raj had made sure that he kept a cool distance from Stuart until Stuart followed him into the back of the store when Raj went to get himself another beer.

"Raj we need to talk" Stuart began briefly looking behind him to check nobody was within earshot

"I told you it was a mistake" Raj said as he began to peel the label from his beer bottle attempting to avoid all eye contact with Stuart

"I don't think I can" Stuart asserted "I have feelings for you Raj and I'm pretty sure that you feel the same way"

"Look nothing like this has ever happened to either of us so we should forget it ever happened ok?" Raj spoke in a hushed tone and was desperate to end the conversation as soon as possible

Stuart looked down at his sneakers, he was about to share something that he had never shared with anyone even his closest friends

"It has happened to me before. There was this guy I met at Art College, it only lasted a few months but it was pretty intense…"

Raj sighed this wasn't what he wanted to hear. He knew that if his family were to ever find out that he had feelings for another man there would be serious consequences; perhaps they would even disown him

"Look Stuart I really don't want to talk about this… in fact I've been texting Lucy recently and she's agreed to meet up for coffee…"

Lucy was Raj's ex-girlfriend who suffered with social anxiety. She had broken up with him the year before after Raj had tried to push her into meeting his friends

"Is everything ok?"

A voice said the two men turned around to see Howard stood in the doorway. Thinking quickly Stuart told Howard of his plans to paint some comic book stuff on the wall of the nursery as a wedding present for Leonard and Penny as he couldn't afford to buy them a gift. He had been asking Raj to help him get hold of the spare key so that he could paint it the following day while the wedding was taking place. Luckily it seemed that Howard hadn't overheard any of the conversation

"Sheldon is about to make a speech" Howard told them

As Raj turned to leave, Stuart caught his arm and with pleading eyes said

"Raj don't do this please….you can't keep running away from your this…and seeing Lucy again all that's gonna happen is that everybody will wind up getting hurt.."

Raj pushed Stuart away

"Stay away from me!" he hissed

Raj left and Stuart remained in the back of the store, Sheldon had begun his speech and the sound of laughter and mention of names such as 'Joyce Kim' and 'Leslie Winkle' were now drifting into his office. He wanted to be happy for Leonard but right now all he could think of was Raj and his state of complete denial.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Valentine's Day dawned on a cold and crisp day in Pasadena. There was even talk on the news of the possibility of snow. Bernadette and Amy were the first to arrive at the hospital to help Penny get ready and to decorate the room with flowers. Penny was looking a lot better; she had been moved out of the ICU and was now in her own room. Carefully Bernadette and Amy helped Penny get out of her hospital gown and into an Oscar de la Renta white satin robe and matching nightdress that they had gone out and brought especially for her wedding. Aside from an IV she was no longer hooked up to any monitors. Having got her changed and settled her back into bed, they set about applying makeup and putting little red roses in Penny's hair to match her bouquet.

"How are you feeling?" Bernadette asked as she painted Penny's nails

"Nervous I can't believe I'm about to get married" Penny answered desperately trying to hold back the tears that would inevitably cause her eye makeup to run once again.

Amy passed Penny a mirror so she could inspect her reflection

There was a light knock at the door and the hospital chaplain put her head around the door and smiled at the sight of Penny and her friends. Amy was now holding baby Grace and Penny's parents were waiting patiently in the hall

"Now all we need is Leonard" Penny said looking over at the door

"Relax he'll be here" Bernadette squeezed Penny's hand "He's been looking forward to this day for seven years…."

At that moment Howard, Raj and Sheldon were in the hospital elevator making their way up to Penny's room. Leonard was visibly nervous, constantly wringing his hands together and using his asthma inhaler

"Are you ok buddy?" Raj asked with a look of concern Leonard had the same look about him as he did when he had gone on his first date with Penny

"Yeah just nervous I can't believe this is happening"

Just over a week ago he had been riding up in the same elevator on his visits to Penny in the ICU, and now he was about to wed her. The woman he had been in love with for since the moment he had first set eyes on her in the hall.

"You know Leonard I'm sorry that we teased you so much about Penny" Howard began and patted his back "I guess both you and I are living proof that sometimes the geek does get the girl"

Leonard smiled remembering the phrase 'our babies will be smart and beautiful'

The elevator stopped, the doors slid open and Leonard and his friends made their way along the hall to Penny's room. The sight of her sat up in bed as he entered the room brought fresh tears to his eyes; despite her recent condition she looked stunning.

"You look beautiful" Leonard mouthed to Penny as Amy fastened a red rose into the button hole of his suit.

"Ok shall we get started?" the chaplain asked

Leonard took a seat beside Penny and held her hand as they said their vows. When the chaplain asked _'who gives this woman to be married'_ Wyatt replied _'I do'_ and stepped forward to kiss the daughter he was so proud of and loved so much. It was a brief but very emotional ceremony and everyone clapped as the chaplain declared Leonard and Penny to be husband and wife. Leonard kissed the new Mrs Hofstadter and Wyatt made a point of welcoming Leonard to the family. Nobody but Penny noticed, but during the ceremony Sheldon had taken hold of Amy's hand, it had been a very sweet moment. For the next couple of hours they took photos on their cell phones, ate the cake that Raj had baked and drank champagne, although Penny was not yet able to drink alcohol much to her dismay. By late afternoon Penny was beginning to tire and Leonard suggested that it was time for everyone to leave so that she could rest. Truthfully he couldn't wait to have some time alone with her and Grace even if they both fell asleep.

Despite it being against hospital policy, Leonard laid on the bed, kicked off his shoes, loosened his tie and was now holding his new wife in his arms. They had spent a blissful couple of hours kissing and stroking each other. After the nurse had been in to do her hourly observations on Penny, Penny had urged Leonard to lock the door so that they could have complete privacy. Wanting only to please her, he had made gentle love to her.

"I love you Mrs Hofstadter" Leonard whispered in Penny's ear after they had finished and were cuddling once again.

"I love you too Dr. Hofstadter" Penny responded

"Hey what about Sheldon hugging you? I sure didn't see that coming" she added

"I think he'd had a bit too much champagne" Leonard said grinning

Out of the window snow had begun to fall, large flakes swirled around in the wind.

"Oh my God Penny it's snowing" Leonard exclaimed "It hasn't snowed in Pasadena for 65 years, now I know for certain that we'll never forget our wedding day"

Penny who had closed her eyed opened them briefly to see out the window. It reminded her of the preserved snowflake that Leonard had brought back from the North Pole. At the time he had told her that it would last forever.

"Do you think love can last for Leonard?" she asked her eyes now shut again

"I like to think so honey" he replied and stroked her hair as began to fall back to sleep "I certainly can't imagine a time when I'm not in love with you"

Across town Stuart was just returning to the comic book store. He had spent the day at Leonard and Penny's apartment painting caricatures of Leonard as Super Man and Penny as Super Girl holding baby Grace on the nursery room wall. He was just settling down to a well-earned beer in the back when he heard a knock on the store door.

"I'm closed' Stuart called as he poked his head out of the office door half expecting to see Lonely Larry or Captain Sweatpants

It was dark and he couldn't quite make out the figure that was stood out on the sidewalk

"Hey Stu its Raj"

It took Stuart a few minutes of nervous fumbling to unlock the door to find Raj standing in the snow swearing his suit from the wedding.

"Oh hi Raj how did the wedding go? I just er got back from painting in Leonard and Penny's apartment…"

Stuart was wearing an artist's smock that was splattered in mostly red and blue paint. Raj didn't reply.

"So how did it go?" Stuart asked again

Reaching out Raj pressed a finger on Stuart's lips to stop him from talking

"Happy Valentine's Day" he whispered.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

It was only a short while after Penny had closed her eyes and fell to sleep, that the long and exciting day caught up with Leonard and he did the same. Falling into a deep sleep, he didn't wake until he felt a hand touching him on his shoulder and heard a familiar voice say his name.

"Leonard"

Opening his eyes he saw Sarah stood beside him. He had never seen her in anything but her scrubs, now she was wearing leather pants and jacket and was holding a motorcycle helmet seemingly on her way home.

"Congratulations I'm so sorry I couldn't make it to your wedding, I just couldn't get away from the ICU today I wound up working a double shift" she whispered not wanting to disturb Penny who was still sleeping "How did it go?"

Leonard began to tell her about the day his face beaming as he recalled every last detail of their special day.

"Listen I could use a coffee do you want to join me?" Leonard asked

Sarah was on the way home but accepted Leonard's offer. He was such a nice guy and although she made it her personal rule not to get to close to the patients or their families, somehow Leonard and Penny had really touched her.

"Let me just say goodbye to Penny" Leonard told her

Penny had rolled onto her side facing away from him so Leonard needed to get off the bed and walk around to the other side to say his goodbye. As he leant over to kiss his wife Sarah saw him flinch and step backwards.

"Sarah something's wrong!" he cried

Immediately Sarah dashed around the bedside and listened for sounds of Penny breathing. Quickly she reacted by pressing the alarm bell.

"I need some help in here" she called out into the hall "code blue!"

A doctor and two nurses came rushing into the room pushing a trolley with a defibrillator.

"Get her on the monitor" Sarah called to a nurse while another nurse grabbed the oxygen mask from the trolley titled Penny's head back and started bagging. Sarah began to administer chest compressions.

."Come on Penny honey don't do this stay with us" she begged while Leonard stood at the foot of the bed frozen with shock.

The doctor looked up at the monitor and frowned. A shot of adrenaline was given and those gathered around the bed stood back as the doctor prepared to use the defibrillator.

"No output"

"Ok let's shock again"

Still no output. Sarah resumed the chest compressions only for the doctor who was shining a small torch into Penny's eyes to raise his hand.

"No Sarah you need to stop now"

At first Sarah ignored his request and continued

"No I think we should keep going" she told him out of breath from her efforts to save Penny

"Sarah I'm calling it you need to stop now" the doctor said firmly

The decision to cease the resuscitation attempt was ultimately his but other nurses were in agreement. With a grim look on his face he turned towards Leonard who had backed into the corner of the room. In the commotion Penny's bouquet of roses had been swept out of the way, scattering red petals onto the bed sheets and onto the floor. The scent of roses and Penny's perfume lingered in the air.

"I'm really sorry Dr Hofstadter theres's nothing more we can do for your wife"

Everything seemed to be happening in slow motion, the words of the doctor were coming across distorted so that at first Leonard couldn't comprehend them.

"I'm so sorry Leonard" Sarah said not wanting to believe herself that Penny was gone

Then it hit. Leonard stared down at Penny in a trance like state

"But we were just talking… we got married today…" he uttered

He stroked her face her skin still felt warm to the touch. She looked so peaceful as though she was still just sleeping. As Sarah watched she could tell that Leonard was going into shock and as he looked around in numb disbelief at the sympathetic faces gathered around the bed it felt as though the room was closing in on him. This couldn't be real. He had to get out. Before Sarah had the chance to stop him Leonard had run from the room. Without hesitation Sarah chased after him down the hall and then several flights of stairs out into the parking lot where she saw him getting into a car, noticing that it had been sprayed with 'Just Married' across the trunk. She shouted out to him but he had driven off the tires screeching as he picked up speed. Fearing that he would end up seriously injuring himself or worse, Sarah realised she had no choice but to go after him.

"Sarah!"

A voice yelled out from behind her. It was the doctor that had responded to the code blue. Ignoring his shouts Sarah mounted her motorcycle.

"Sarah what do you think you're doing?" he demanded "Are you seriously gonna chase through the streets of Pasadena in this weather after a guy who's probably hell bent on getting himself killed?!"

"I'm not your concern anymore Greg" Sarah replied coldly

Time was slipping away, she could already see the tail lights of Leonard's car exiting the parking lot and making a right turn.

"Sarah I still care about you" Gregg reached out to take hold of Sarah's arm but her response was to shove him away with her free hand.

"Well maybe you should have thought of that before you slept with an intern" she yelled before dropping her visor and starting the engine

"Sarah please wait! Don't do this!"

Gregg could only watch as the woman that up until a few months ago had been his fiancée raced out of the hospital parking lot and off into the night.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Sarah trailed Leonard's car for a few miles flashing her headlights and sounding her horn in an attempt to make him slow down. The snow was really coming down hard and fast now making driving conditions treacherous. As he drove images of Penny flashed through Leonard's mind visualising her on the day he had first met her standing in her apartment unpacking boxes, their first kiss on the couch on Halloween and then the day when she had first told him that she loved him out in the hall

"_Listen to me you're the one I'm with, you know I love you, so please relax because you're driving me crazy…."_

Leonard didn't slow down and stop until he had driven into what looked to be a very rough neighbourhood with numerous graffiti covered walls and copious amounts of trash littering the street. It seemed that every other house was boarded up, the residents having long since abandoned it. By the time Sarah pulled her motorcycle over Leonard had jumped out from his car and had run across the street towards a house and was pounding on a door with his fists

"Jimmy!" he cried out "Jimmy get out here now!"

The light in the porch came on; sensing that there was going to be trouble Sarah darted across the street and called out to Leonard

"Leonard what are you doing?"

Leonard didn't respond. The front door opened and there stood Jimmy wearing stained and dirty jeans and a sweatshirt; his breath reeked of alcohol. It was obvious to see that Leonard was in his wedding suit, the red rose was still in his button hole although the suit itself was now completely dishevelled.

"Leonard"

"You killed her" Leonard spat at him through gritted teeth "You killed my wife"

And with those words Leonard launched himself at Jimmy with all the force he could muster, and although Jimmy was twice Leonard's size and by far stronger he did not resist or try to defend himself, instead he stood still as Leonard punched him in the gut over and over again until eventually he doubled over clutching his stomach and fell to the ground

"I'm sorry man… I'm so sorry I didn't mean to…" Jimmy whimpered pathetically

"We just had a baby…. we got married today everything was going to work out ok. You made my life a living HELL during high school but that wasn't enough for you was it? You had to take the most precious person in my life from me too…"

Leonard was beginning to break down, the adrenaline that had been keeping him going was fading and now agonising pain was beginning to overwhelm him. She was gone. His beloved Penny was gone and no amount of hitting out or shouting was going to bring her back. Leonard collapsed onto the ground only meters from where Jimmy was still lying; Sarah rushed toward him and threw her arms around and held him as he cried like a child. Ironically it was how he would often cry in private all those years ago when the bullying really got to him. Jimmy began to apologise again

"Don't you dare even try to say you're sorry" Sarah yelled pointing her index finger angrily in his direction "Do you know how many lives I have seen ripped apart by jerks like you that don't think of anyone but themselves before getting into their car drunk?"

It was a rhetorical question to which she neither expected nor wanted a response

"Get away from us!"

Jimmy got to his feet but instead of going back inside the house he staggered off down the street to do the one thing he always did when he didn't know what else to do. Drink.

"What am I gonna do?" Leonard sobbed as Sarah tried in vain to comfort him

"Grace oh my God Grace I just left her…"

"Sssh" Sarah soothed and stroked Leonard's hair "Grace is being taken care of we just need to take care of you right now"

Leonard was visibly shaking from the cold

"Come on honey let me take you home"

Leonard was watching as Jimmy walked away along the street. The harsh reality was hitting him hard, not only had Jimmy taken the love of his life from him but he had robbed Grace of ever having the chance of knowing her mother. At that moment he knew he couldn't let him get away with what he had done. Before Sarah knew what was happening he was on his feet and had run back to his car

"Leonard!" Sarah screamed after him but his anger had possessed him.

She could only watch as Leonard started his car and revved the engine a few times before speeding off. Turning her head she could see Jimmy a short distance away and about to cross the street. As he stepped off the sidewalk the headlights from Leonard's car dazzled him causing him to shield his eyes with his hand. There was a blood curdling thud as Jimmy flipped up onto the hood of the car and smashed up against the windshield his eyes fixing directly onto Leonard behind the wheel…

Leonard sat bolt upright in bed. His heart was racing and he was out of breath and in desperate need of his asthma inhaler. The t-shirt he was wearing was soaked in sweat and was sticking to his body. The room was in total darkness; from beyond the door he could hear the TV and the sound of an audience's laughter. Then the sound of someone laughing in the lounge, there was no mistaking it was Penny's laugh.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Reaching out Leonard switched on the lamp and felt around for his glasses on the bedside table. Rising from the bed his legs felt like jelly and at first he was uncertain as to whether he would be able to walk. The light from the hall light hurt his eyes as he made his way out of the bedroom and slowly towards the lounge using the walls for support. There she was seated on the couch beside Howard and Bernadette laughing and smiling as she ate; Raj was sat on the floor and on the opposite couch sat Sheldon in his newly designated 'spot' and Amy. A selection of Chinese takeout food was laid out on the coffee table

"Oh hey honey you're awake, I figured you were tired so I decided to let you sleep a while longer, I've saved you some food"

Penny leant forward and picked up one of the cartons and offered it to him

"It took us ages the traffic was terrible there was a real bad car wreck… plus we had to make a special run to TWO different grocery stores for SOMEBODY'S food order…"

Penny shot Sheldon an annoyed look but he continued to eat choosing to ignore the remark

"In a way it's just as well we stopped at the store otherwise who knows maybe Penny and I would have got caught up in it…." Bernadette added and felt a shiver go up her spine "It really makes you think how just a few minutes could potentially change your life…."

There was a short silence as they all contemplated this fact

"Oh and Stuart called me when we were out" Penny continued " He wanted to get us a present for the baby but he's a little broke right now so he's offered to paint some comic book stuff on the nursery wall isn't that awesome? "

Leonard didn't speak but continued to stare in disbelief at his still pregnant girlfriend; Penny frowned noticing that he was as white as a ghost; he had been working so hard recently she hoped he wasn't getting sick

"Are you ok sweetie? You look pale are you getting sick?" Penny shuffled herself to the edge of the couch and got to her feet "Leonard honey what is it?"

Seemingly oblivious to Penny's concern for Leonard Howard began to speak

"Actually seeing as we're all together Bernadette and I have some news we'd like to share with you all…"

Howard slipped an arm around his wife but before he could continue he was interrupted. Jimmy Speckerman's picture had just flashed up on the TV and a news reporter stood behind a police cordon was talking to camera

"_It's understood that the driver was local Pasadena resident Jimmy Speckerman aged 34 who is now in a serious but stable condition in hospital having received immediate medical assistance at the roadside from an off duty nurse, the driver of the other vehicle involved in the collision only received minor injuries. Although it is currently unconfirmed there are reports that Mr Speckerman had been drinking…."_

"Isn't that the Jimmy Speckerman who used to bully you at school Leonard?" Penny asked

Upon hearing the name Leonard turned his head to stare at the screen. He was yet to utter a word, without taking his eyes off the TV he backed out of the room and into the hall only stopping only to pick up Penny's car keys from the bowl by the door. In the lounge they all heard the door to the apartment slam.

"Where is he going?" Howard asked

"I don't know but he'll freeze to death out there in just his shorts" Penny said by now beginning to feel scared by Leonard's bizarre behaviour.

Penny followed her boyfriend outside to find him in the downstairs parking lot sitting in her car on the passenger side. Opening the driver's side door she slid in beside him

"Leonard what is all this about honey? You're beginning to scare me"

Leonard reached forward and opened the glove compartment; there inside was a small black jewellery box reacting quickly Penny slammed it shut

"Leonard! What are you doing looking in there?" she exclaimed

With that Leonard broke down in tears and sobbed his head resting on the dash board. Penny had seen him cry on a number of occasions but had never seen him break down completely in the way he was now.

"Leonard baby its ok I'm sorry I didn't mean to yell at you..…" Penny soothed

It was freezing in the car and Leonard was shaking vigorously prompting Penny to reach for the travel rug which she kept on the backseat and drape it over Leonard's shoulders

Reaching out Leonard cupped Penny's face in his hands so that she was looking directly into his eyes

"Promise me you'll never leave me Penny; promise me we're gonna be a family and that we're gonna have so many happy years together; you know I couldn't bare to lose you…." Leonard's words were broken by another sob as he rubbed Penny's belly and felt the baby kick

"Leonard I promise you I'm…. we're here to stay…" Penny corrected herself still deeply concerned to see the man she loved in such a state, she couldn't imagine what had gotten him so upset in the time it had taken her to get the takeout. Penny cuddled him and waited patiently for his sobs to subside

"Will you marry me Leonard?" she whispered into his ear

Leonard sniffed and began to pull away from Penny's embrace. He wanted to look at her so he could take in every last detail of her face

"I was planning to ask you in a few weeks' time but somehow the time seems right now..."

As Leonard looked out of the windshield he saw that snow had begun to fall and settle onto the hood of the car and he remembered what Penny had said in what he now knew to be the most intense dream of his life about love lasting forever. Opening the glove compartment Penny took out the box containing the ring and offered it to Leonard

"Well will you marry me? I know you said you wanted 'the whole nine yards' but…"

His hesitation was making her feel a little nervous. But she needn't have worried; taking her hand Leonard took the ring from the box and slipped it onto Penny's finger

"This is perfect" Leonard whispered resting his own forehead on Penny's and looking deep into her eyes "and the answer's yes"

**THE END.**

**NOTE: Thanks to everyone that has taken the time to review my fist proper attempt at a fan fiction, I've enjoyed contributing. I realise that the ending of this story hasn't really allowed for the relationship between Raj and Stuart to be fully developed and explored. I hope to write another story in the future which will focus more closely on their relationship**.


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